Hot Best Seller

How to Survive a Horror Movie

Availability: Ready to download

Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid. From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover: - How to Perform an Exorcism - What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer - How to Pe Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid. From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover: - How to Perform an Exorcism - What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer - How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheriff - How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll - How to Survive an Alien Invasion - How to Tell If You've Been Dead Since the Beginning of the Movie and much, much more. Complete with useful instructions, insane illustrations, and a list of 100 important films to study, How to Survive a Horror Movie is essential reading for prom queens, jocks, teenage babysitters, and anyone employed by a summer camp.


Compare

Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid. From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover: - How to Perform an Exorcism - What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer - How to Pe Be Afraid. Be Very Afraid. From ghosts, vampires, and zombies to serial killers, cannibalistic hillbillies, and haunted Japanese videocassettes, How to Survive a Horror Movie shows how to defeat every obstacle found in scary films. Readers will discover: - How to Perform an Exorcism - What to Do If You Did Something Last Summer - How to Persuade the Skeptical Local Sheriff - How to Vanquish a Murderous Doll - How to Survive an Alien Invasion - How to Tell If You've Been Dead Since the Beginning of the Movie and much, much more. Complete with useful instructions, insane illustrations, and a list of 100 important films to study, How to Survive a Horror Movie is essential reading for prom queens, jocks, teenage babysitters, and anyone employed by a summer camp.

30 review for How to Survive a Horror Movie

  1. 4 out of 5

    Mike (the Paladin)

    I saw this book reviewed here...and felt strangely compelled to reserve it at the library. Just after picking it up and reading the opening chapter on how to tell if you actually are trapped in a horror movie....I discovered a box of very old books I hadn't realized I even owned??? Upon finding them I went searching out shelf space for the dusty old volumes (oddly as soon as I went into the dark bedroom to shelve the books my cat screamed and leapt from one of the shadowy shelves right at me. Sh I saw this book reviewed here...and felt strangely compelled to reserve it at the library. Just after picking it up and reading the opening chapter on how to tell if you actually are trapped in a horror movie....I discovered a box of very old books I hadn't realized I even owned??? Upon finding them I went searching out shelf space for the dusty old volumes (oddly as soon as I went into the dark bedroom to shelve the books my cat screamed and leapt from one of the shadowy shelves right at me. She'd never done anything like that before...weird.) As I settled down to read How To Survive a Horror Movie...an unpredicted thunder storm broke outside and we had a power failure. Well, doing the obvious thing I went into the dark attic to rummage through a still packed box to find a flashlight, (we just moved into this place...it was oddly torn up and had a lot of damage to the walls and woodwork before the landlord did the repairs, he was strangely close mouthed about who lived here before, and what happened.) Anyway, having gotten the flashlight (I'll have to check out that odd noise, the rattling scrape that kept up over in the darkest corner of the attic while I was up there, but I don't have time now.) I returned to my dark corner with my favorite chair, near the unusual little rock I found in the garden, the one that seems to have a human face on it. I keep it on my computer desk. Anyway, with my flashlight I started to read again only to be distracted by a huge clap of thunder and an unusually bright flash of lightening. The flash showed a face outside the window, some guy in a hockey mask... Well you get the idea, it wasn't shaping up to be a great night. Along with the Zombie Survival Guide this may be an essential volume for well...surviving, you know, staying alive and not ending up dead....or undead, or whatever. The book is fun, I got a lot of laughs and while it's not actually funny from cover to cover, it's enough so that I'll give it a 4. Oh, the lights are back on. You'll have to excuse me now, there's someone at the door and they're stuck out in the storm. The TV came back on with the power and I have to turn it down, so I can hear what the person at the door is saying. There was something on the TV about an escaped mental patient, a murderer from the hospital for the criminally insane and I can't leave whoever that is out there in the storm with a dangerous killer on the loose.... Noticed there's an Audible version of this now (and it's their daily special today) if you're interested in an audio version.

  2. 5 out of 5

    Jessica

    I received this book for free from the publisher (Quirk Books) in exchange for an honest review. This was such a fun read! This book essentially makes fun of horror movies and all the cliches that come with them. For example, one of the things it says NOT to do is investigate strange things. The book explicitly states, “Investigation = mutilation” (pg. 36). Nothing good ever comes from checking something out. That’s just asking to be murdered. The book also alludes to many famous horror movies, I received this book for free from the publisher (Quirk Books) in exchange for an honest review. This was such a fun read! This book essentially makes fun of horror movies and all the cliches that come with them. For example, one of the things it says NOT to do is investigate strange things. The book explicitly states, “Investigation = mutilation” (pg. 36). Nothing good ever comes from checking something out. That’s just asking to be murdered. The book also alludes to many famous horror movies, so horror enthusiasts will have fun catching them all. The short forward/apology from Wes Craven was perfect. So on brand and a great way to kick of the book. The illustrations and the list of movie recommendations were a nice touch as well. The only critique I have is that I would have loved a concluding chapter to bring the book full circle. Or even a short paragraph stating something like, “Congratulations! If you’ve made it this far then you are one of the rare survivors of a horror movie…” I thought it was a missed opportunity and would have been the perfect place for one final joke about horror movies. Overall, if you’re a fan of horror movies or just want a fun Halloween read, then read this book!

  3. 5 out of 5

    karen

    i had to read this when i saw that he has a jane austen/zombie book coming out soon. this was a good way to kill time until the release date. but now i am finally going to have to read pride and prejudice!! dammit!

  4. 5 out of 5

    Latasha

    this book is HILARIOUS!!!!! if you love - or even just like- horror movies, you should own this book.

  5. 5 out of 5

    Deb✨

    Humorous, thorough (it covered about everything as if you suddenly somehow found yourself as an actor in one and weren't aware, haha) and a fairly quick read.

  6. 5 out of 5

    Stacee

    I’m a huge fan of horror movies and I loved P+P+Z, so I was intrigued by this. I loved the sections and how it was chaptered out. Pretty much everything was filled with snark and I found myself laughing out loud in several places. The contrasting pages and illustrations made for something a little extra that I wasn’t expecting. Overall, it was a quick and fun read. I’m sure I’ll have it in my head for the next horror movie I see. **Huge thanks to Quirk Books for providing the arc free of charge* I’m a huge fan of horror movies and I loved P+P+Z, so I was intrigued by this. I loved the sections and how it was chaptered out. Pretty much everything was filled with snark and I found myself laughing out loud in several places. The contrasting pages and illustrations made for something a little extra that I wasn’t expecting. Overall, it was a quick and fun read. I’m sure I’ll have it in my head for the next horror movie I see. **Huge thanks to Quirk Books for providing the arc free of charge**

  7. 5 out of 5

    Trudi

    Horror movies and I? We go way back. I've been a voracious consumer since I was eight and my enthusiasm for the genre hasn't diminished with ... ahem ... maturity and wisdom. So yeah, it's been a lifelong love affair, one I don't hide, or feel I need to apologize for. Because even amidst the dreck, there exists some awesome cinematic gems, and amidst the classics there are film moments of hair-raising, heart-stopping, enviable genius. The naysayers who decry: "how can you watch that garbage" are rud Horror movies and I? We go way back. I've been a voracious consumer since I was eight and my enthusiasm for the genre hasn't diminished with ... ahem ... maturity and wisdom. So yeah, it's been a lifelong love affair, one I don't hide, or feel I need to apologize for. Because even amidst the dreck, there exists some awesome cinematic gems, and amidst the classics there are film moments of hair-raising, heart-stopping, enviable genius. The naysayers who decry: "how can you watch that garbage" are rude asshats, unimaginative douchebags or big fat chickens. Okay, maybe that's a little harsh. Rationally I know horror movies aren't for everyone, but there's that rabid part of my brain that thinks if you're not with us, you're against us. In writing this little manifesto on how to survive a horror movie, Seth Grahame-Smith proves that he understands horror and humor are a marriage made in heaven – the two go together like Pam and Jim, Butch and Sundance, Pancho and Lefty, Dolly and Kenny and that other celestial match – Sam and Bruce. Horror indulges in all forms of comedy – satire, slapstick, black, blue, Freudian, farce, irony – you name it, it’s been done; in some cases to humbling effect, either deliberately with great focus, or by happy, moronic accident. Don’t believe me? Look no further than these cinema classics (and I’m not being facetious here): An American Werewolf in London, Evil Dead I and II, The Return of the Living Dead, Creepshow, and Shaun of the Dead. All of the above are prime examples of why I’d rather be watching horror movies rather than reading about them. But every now and then a book of this sort breaks through my defenses, giving me that “come hither” look I just can’t resist. This book has giggles, a few gut busters, and a whole lot of in-jokes delivered with tongue firmly planted in cheek. There are some sections that fall flat being over-written and a little dumb, but there are also shining moments of pure cleverness. Any die-hard horror fan who reads this little book is going to think “I could have written this and probably done a better job”; maybe, but you didn’t, and neither did I so we’re going to shut our pie holes and give props where they’re due. More than anything, this little book is pure goddamn fun. Plain and simple. However, it is not a classic – for that you have to read If Chins Could Kill: Confessions of a B Movie Actor and Danse Macabre. These definitive texts will teach you everything you need to know about the industry, the genre, the people who make their living by it, and the people who love it. Seth Grahame-Smith wants to make us laugh, but it also comes across how much he loves celluloid horror and because of that I know he is one of us and therefore to be trusted. There are just too many delightful nuggets to quote from here and rather than trying to capture them all I’m just going to say go read the book. But I can’t resist throwing out a few of my favorites: The Seven Deadly Horror Movie Sins: 3rd Deadly Sin: Independence – “Screw you guys I’m going home”. Actually you’re going about a third of the way home. 5th Deadly Sin: Curiosity – “Do you think it’s dead?” No. Go ahead and poke it with a stick. How to Defeat a Killer Doll: Kick the Crap Out of It. Why are you running away from something that could be imprisoned with Legos? How to Kill a Vampire: Interview It. What to Do If Your Corn Has Children In It (I still can’t say this out loud without giggling my ass off) The Amityville Horror (1979) – Bad things happen in house. Family buys house. Bad things happen to family. Carrie (1976) – If you haven’t seen this masterpiece yet, pelt yourself with tampons and go to your prayer closet. The Hitcher (1986) – How many times do I have to tell you: Never pick up Rutger Hauer! Seven (1995) – I went to see this film by myself on a cold, rainy Boston day. I haven’t smiled since. The Sixth Sense (1999) – Hi, my name’s M. Night Shyamalan. Trust me…you’ll learn how to pronounce it.

  8. 5 out of 5

    Gary

    Well, now I know that all I have to do to survive is whip my junk out since full-frontal male nudity does not exist in horror films. Cheers!

  9. 5 out of 5

    Emily

    "I've always had a special place in my heart for horror movie characters." How to Survive a Horror Movie is a guide for what to do if you find yourself unfortunately trapped in a horror movie. This ended up being more of a coffee table book than an actual book to read, but that's fine. I think it was a little too long for the coffee table book style, and I ended up losing interest somewhere along the way, and skimming. It was entertaining, but I'm not really sure that it offers anything new or u "I've always had a special place in my heart for horror movie characters." How to Survive a Horror Movie is a guide for what to do if you find yourself unfortunately trapped in a horror movie. This ended up being more of a coffee table book than an actual book to read, but that's fine. I think it was a little too long for the coffee table book style, and I ended up losing interest somewhere along the way, and skimming. It was entertaining, but I'm not really sure that it offers anything new or unique. Some of it was amusing, and some of it was tedious. I guess I was hoping it would be more personal and in more of a storytelling format. Overall, it's a fun & quick read for horror movie fans.

  10. 4 out of 5

    Suzanne

    Finally - a self-help book that addresses my life!

  11. 5 out of 5

    Tiffy

    Such a fun book for everyone to read and/or listen to if they are into horror movies.

  12. 5 out of 5

    Eli

    This was so awesome. As a horror movie fanatic, I really love this type of thing. It was really hilarious and poked fun at all the stupid things that happen in horror movies without denouncing the genre. It was packed with tons of references to various horror movies across the genre (from Halloween to Saw to Snakes on a Plane). And with a foreword by Wes Craven, you may be able to do no wrong. This book reminded me of Scream in many ways, but it really expanded and included various genres and si This was so awesome. As a horror movie fanatic, I really love this type of thing. It was really hilarious and poked fun at all the stupid things that happen in horror movies without denouncing the genre. It was packed with tons of references to various horror movies across the genre (from Halloween to Saw to Snakes on a Plane). And with a foreword by Wes Craven, you may be able to do no wrong. This book reminded me of Scream in many ways, but it really expanded and included various genres and situations. I found it hilarious. There's also a recommended viewing list in the back. I do love lists. I copied it for future reference.

  13. 5 out of 5

    Devann

    actual rating: 3.5 This was funny, but also kind of exhausting? I generally feel this way about a comedy book when it's like every. single. sentence. is a reference to something so about halfway through you're just like god this feels like an extended Family Guy episode and there's a reason those are so short. The premise is entertaining and there were several good bits and I even laughed out loud at some points, but it also seemed to be kind of all over the place and written both as actual rating: 3.5 This was funny, but also kind of exhausting? I generally feel this way about a comedy book when it's like every. single. sentence. is a reference to something so about halfway through you're just like god this feels like an extended Family Guy episode and there's a reason those are so short. The premise is entertaining and there were several good bits and I even laughed out loud at some points, but it also seemed to be kind of all over the place and written both as if you are in an actual 'horrorverse' world and also as if you are just on a movie set so I feel like maybe he didn't really have enough material and was trying to stretch it out. There are several comic-style illustrations throughout which I thought was a nice touch. There was also a list of horror movies at the end that he thought were 'the best' and that you should watch, which I always find a bit pretentious but maybe that's just me [I mean, it's not there was really anything on there we haven't all heard of before]. Anyway, a decent enough book and only took me about an hour to read, but in my opinion not as good as his longer fiction works.

  14. 4 out of 5

    Lilyn G. | Sci-Fi & Scary

    This made me laugh so damned hard. A must have for horror fans. Full review to come. Disclaimer: I received a copy of this book from the publisher for review consideration.

  15. 4 out of 5

    Jennifer

    The Good: The book starts off with a delightful prologue from Wes Craven, which is definitely worth the read. Seth Grahame-Smith is quickly becoming a household name, especially with a movie adaption of his Pride & Prejudice & Zombies coming out soon. How to Survive a Horror Movie contains a wealth of his tongue-in-cheek humor that fans will love. As an avid horror movie fan, I appreciated quite a bit of what the author was putting out there in this book. "What to Do If Your Corn Has Chi The Good: The book starts off with a delightful prologue from Wes Craven, which is definitely worth the read. Seth Grahame-Smith is quickly becoming a household name, especially with a movie adaption of his Pride & Prejudice & Zombies coming out soon. How to Survive a Horror Movie contains a wealth of his tongue-in-cheek humor that fans will love. As an avid horror movie fan, I appreciated quite a bit of what the author was putting out there in this book. "What to Do If Your Corn Has Children In It" may just be the best chapter title ever. The Bad: This is much less useful compared to other pop culture survival books in terms of actual real world application. At least in the Zombie Survival Guide, I learned tips that could be used in situations other than zombie attacks. This book rested solely on its humor and that was asking too much of it. While parts are very funny, others fall flat. This is very much a coffee table book - something to build a conversation around rather than something to be read.

  16. 5 out of 5

    Brenton

    Perhaps capitalizing on the zombie survival trend, this book attempts to cover ALL manner of horror films and tells the reader how to tell if you're in one and what to do next. I found it humorous enough, but it felt like the author was rather stretched for material. He seemed to bounce back and forth between two vantage points - one being that there actually is a Horrorverse and you are in it, the other being that you are just on a movie set. The advice for what to do in the actual H Perhaps capitalizing on the zombie survival trend, this book attempts to cover ALL manner of horror films and tells the reader how to tell if you're in one and what to do next. I found it humorous enough, but it felt like the author was rather stretched for material. He seemed to bounce back and forth between two vantage points - one being that there actually is a Horrorverse and you are in it, the other being that you are just on a movie set. The advice for what to do in the actual Horrorverse was funny and engaging, but it seemed that whenever he ran out of ideas the author started to write as though you are only on a movie set, and tailored his survival advice towards using this fact to your advantage. This seemed like a sloppy copout to me, and damaged the cohesiveness of the book. If you're just on a set, then you're not really in any mortal danger to begin with, so that whole shtick seemed to shoot the book in its own foot.

  17. 5 out of 5

    Audra (ouija.doodle.reads)

    This book is a MUST-READ for horror fans! I loved this little guidebook to the Terrorverse. Grahame-Smith is more than proficient in storytelling tropes when it comes to horror, so he is the perfect guide for a quippy, hilarious look at what makes horror movies tick. I found myself laughing out loud as I read. The book is devised as seemingly endless lists like how to defeat survive a haunted house; how to stay awake for a week; 10 things to never, ever, ever put in a child This book is a MUST-READ for horror fans! I loved this little guidebook to the Terrorverse. Grahame-Smith is more than proficient in storytelling tropes when it comes to horror, so he is the perfect guide for a quippy, hilarious look at what makes horror movies tick. I found myself laughing out loud as I read. The book is devised as seemingly endless lists like how to defeat survive a haunted house; how to stay awake for a week; 10 things to never, ever, ever put in a child’s room; and how to tell if an object is evil. This book is a meta-experience, the whole thing making fun of the unspoken rule in horror films that the realm of horror has never existed. You know, all of a sudden, the characters are attacked by zombies and we’re all screaming “aim for the head!!!” but the characters act like they’ve been living under a rock and have never even heard of zombies before. Instead, this guide imagines putting someone who has horror movie knowledge (it’s you, dear reader!) into the movie. Not only will they know it’s horror, but also they’ll know it’s a movie. Genius and hilarious, and 100 points for poking fun at all the classic horror clichés. I really felt my creative juices getting all stirred up as I read this—I think it could also be an excellent resource for writers who are thinking about horror tropes: how to use them and how to subvert them. I think this book would make a weirdly compelling horror movie itself. My thanks to Quirk Books for my copy of this one to read and review!

  18. 5 out of 5

    Michael

    Let's be honest here and admit that for the most part that horror films are predictable. Scream gave us some easy to follow rules to survive a horror movie and now we have a survival guide written by the guy who gave us Pride Prejudice And Zombies and Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter. How you view this book depends on your views of the horror genre. If you aren't a fan then you'll hate this (if you hate horror films why are you even reading this review?). It's quite a humorous book that doesn't t Let's be honest here and admit that for the most part that horror films are predictable. Scream gave us some easy to follow rules to survive a horror movie and now we have a survival guide written by the guy who gave us Pride Prejudice And Zombies and Abraham Lincoln Vampire Hunter. How you view this book depends on your views of the horror genre. If you aren't a fan then you'll hate this (if you hate horror films why are you even reading this review?). It's quite a humorous book that doesn't take a lot of time to read and there really useful information packed in here to ensure that you actually survive and live to breath another day. It clearly takes the piss to the entire genre and nothing is sacred. Everything that you could encounter in the terrorverse is covered. Zombies, vampires, and even killer dolls. Nothing in this book will save you from anything in the real world so if you're looking to fight of muggers or terrorists you are completely fucked. It's obvious that Seth is a fan and that's what makes the book so amusing. You can't help but laugh at these tips even though they could save your life if you're in a horror movie. As a fan and writer of the horror genre I become even more aware of just how predictable this genre is and I think we all know this, but that's why we're all fans. We know what's going to happen and now thanks to Seth we can survive! As good as this book is there's really no reason to re-read this so that drags it down a little. If you laughed the first time what are the odds that you'll find yourself laughing just as hard if you read it a second or third time. It's a great conversation starter for horror fans and it allows us to see the films through the eyes of their creator. When we watch a horror movie we will laugh as everyone dies and we know exactly how to survive. We can thank Seth for giving us the knowledge that will save our asses.

  19. 4 out of 5

    Laura

    Hilarious! Takes a lot from classic, easy to recognize horror movies and compiles advice in humorous and bizarre lists. This author has a great sense of humor and the book is pretty short which is the perfect length to end before the jokes get stale. Anyone who enjoys the older horror movies like Nightmare on Elm street, Halloween, Friday the 13th, the Shining, Children of the Corn, Pet Sementary, etc. will have fun with this book. This book wins the award of MOST impulsive buy! But the lau Hilarious! Takes a lot from classic, easy to recognize horror movies and compiles advice in humorous and bizarre lists. This author has a great sense of humor and the book is pretty short which is the perfect length to end before the jokes get stale. Anyone who enjoys the older horror movies like Nightmare on Elm street, Halloween, Friday the 13th, the Shining, Children of the Corn, Pet Sementary, etc. will have fun with this book. This book wins the award of MOST impulsive buy! But the laughs I got from it made it worth it. Sample sections include: How to stay awake for a week, 10 places to never ever, ever go under any circumstances, What to do if you did something last summer, How to tell if you've been dead since the beginning of the movie, What to do if your corn has children in it, etc. Its seriously funny from beginning to end.

  20. 5 out of 5

    Kelly Hager

    As a near-lifelong horror fan, I was so excited to get to read this book. I feel like I'm definitely a final girl, but that also depends on the type of movie we're in. As someone who's basically the lady version of Randy in Scream, I'll survive the first one handily, but if there's a sequel? I'm totally toast. If you have a similar personality, this book could save your life. I cosign all the advice and would add this: If you survive a massacre, here's what you need to do:< As a near-lifelong horror fan, I was so excited to get to read this book. I feel like I'm definitely a final girl, but that also depends on the type of movie we're in. As someone who's basically the lady version of Randy in Scream, I'll survive the first one handily, but if there's a sequel? I'm totally toast. If you have a similar personality, this book could save your life. I cosign all the advice and would add this: If you survive a massacre, here's what you need to do: You may be tempted to go to the middle of nowhere to heal your fractured psyche. Don't do that; you will die immediately. But at the same time, don't stay too close to home. (One state away is too close; evil will be mad that you barely even tried to hide.) Instead, find some new people and tell them all about what happened to you and your last friends. With most horror movies, that's enough to lead the villain to them instead. Now get in your car and drive far away. Keep telling your story. Those people will be fine. Or not. Either way, you're surviving.  We're heading into the Halloween season (the best time of the year!) and this book may save your life. Highly recommended.

  21. 4 out of 5

    James Tullos

    I was given an ARC copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. It's difficult for me to review comedy because all I can say is "That's funny." This book is really funny, it's just an overview of horror movie cliches presented as a survival guide for the characters. It's full of small little jokes poking fun at the genre that had me laughing consistently. Normally I'd give this 4 stars but while reading you get a genuine feeling that the writer loves horror movies an I was given an ARC copy of this book in exchange for an honest review. It's difficult for me to review comedy because all I can say is "That's funny." This book is really funny, it's just an overview of horror movie cliches presented as a survival guide for the characters. It's full of small little jokes poking fun at the genre that had me laughing consistently. Normally I'd give this 4 stars but while reading you get a genuine feeling that the writer loves horror movies and is just poking fun at them. Sometimes these sorts of parodies come across as mean-spirited, like the creator(s) hate what they're spoofing, and this manages to avoid that. Part of me doesn't want to give this 5 stars because I reserve those for grand, epic stories that blow me away, the rest of me remembers that this wasn't trying to be some grand story, it's just a funny love letter to the horror genre. If you like horror movies, check it out. It's not very long and easy to get through. If you don't like horror movies, then most of the humor probably won't hit you, so you can skip it.

  22. 4 out of 5

    David

    the theme is to survive a horror movie

  23. 4 out of 5

    Scott Rhee

    Seth Grahame-Smith obviously spent a large part of his childhood (and much of his adulthood) watching horror movies. I can totally relate to this, as I have spent most of my life watching horror movies as well. Clearly, those of us who are not in jail or mental institutions have learned to channel (or divert) our love of horror movies into something healthy. For Grahame-Smith, it's writing books. In "How to Survive a Horror Movie", SGS has written the ultimate survival guide for the perhaps unli Seth Grahame-Smith obviously spent a large part of his childhood (and much of his adulthood) watching horror movies. I can totally relate to this, as I have spent most of my life watching horror movies as well. Clearly, those of us who are not in jail or mental institutions have learned to channel (or divert) our love of horror movies into something healthy. For Grahame-Smith, it's writing books. In "How to Survive a Horror Movie", SGS has written the ultimate survival guide for the perhaps unlikely but frighteningly possible scenario of finding one's self stuck in a horror movie. *Would you know the correct weapon to use against a psychotic child-killer that appears to victims in dreams? (Answer: No-Doze and/or having Heather Langenkamp or Johnny Depp as a significant other) *Would you be able to recognize the 10 ways to determine if your house is haunted? (Do your faucets bleed? Does the house tell you to "get out"? Are you strangely compelled to murder your entire family with an axe every time you arrive home? If the answer is "yes" to all of these, chances are good your house is haunted) *Could you tell when an animal is evil? (Creatures that are "always evil", according to SGS: monkeys, rottweilers, and sharks, just to name three.) *Do you know the only correct solution to arriving on a planet full of hostile aliens? (Answer: "Nuke the entire planet from orbit: it's the only way to be sure...") This invaluable book is chock-full of excellent advice for keeping your stupid ass alive in case of alien invasions, your car stalls in the middle of an old forgotten town, or if you ever find yourself being chased by kids in a cornfield. You never know, it could happen...

  24. 5 out of 5

    Geli

    A completely hilarious book with great advice. Seriously, I would carry this with me always just in case that so called fun camping trip turns into a nightmare when we stumble upon an ax murder. You never know when you'll need to reference it. Seth Grahame-Smith covers everything you'll ever need to know if ever caught in a horror movie situation. This will keep you laughing out loud and remembering all your favorite B horror films. I cant wait to read more of his work.

  25. 5 out of 5

    Daria Yune

    The thing about this book is that it can be enjoyed by people who love horror movies, as well as by people who don’t. This is mainly because the book serves as a satire to this entire film genre, while making a bunch of references to an extent diversity of these movies. It’s an extremely entertaining and fun read that I would easily recommend.

  26. 4 out of 5

    Stephanie Griffin

    Some lines made me laugh but I was offended by Graham-Smith's objectification of women.

  27. 5 out of 5

    Laura Newsholme

    What a riot this book was! Any discerning horror movie fan will love this survival guide if you somehow find yourself in the Terrorverse. Filled with puns and poking fun at the cliches that make the genre what it is, this is a joyous homage to the glory that is horror in all of its various forms. There are tips to check whether or not you yourself are in fact already dead, useful hints for detecting demon possession with the subtle use of dogs and commiseration for those of us who are unfortunat What a riot this book was! Any discerning horror movie fan will love this survival guide if you somehow find yourself in the Terrorverse. Filled with puns and poking fun at the cliches that make the genre what it is, this is a joyous homage to the glory that is horror in all of its various forms. There are tips to check whether or not you yourself are in fact already dead, useful hints for detecting demon possession with the subtle use of dogs and commiseration for those of us who are unfortunately not attractive enough to make it to the end credits. My only criticism is that it just wasn't long enough - I could have read a 500 page tome on this subject and loved every minute of it. Overall, this is a really funny and quick read that I would recommend to anyone who knows not to run upstairs when you should be running out of the door! I received a free copy of this book from NetGalley in exchange for a fair and honest review.

  28. 5 out of 5

    Horror DNA

    How to Survive a Horror Movie is a tongue-in-cheek guide loaded with humorous insights to the many familiar cinematic tropes that populate the genre. The book opens with a foreword from director Wes Craven (Shocker, The People Under the Stairs), who sets the tone with an apology for all the hapless victims he has killed over his career. This is followed by an author’s introduction in which he reflects on the book’s original 2007 publication and details what’s new in this updated edition. The genre has grown over the past d(, How to Survive a Horror Movie is a tongue-in-cheek guide loaded with humorous insights to the many familiar cinematic tropes that populate the genre. The book opens with a foreword from director Wes Craven (Shocker, The People Under the Stairs), who sets the tone with an apology for all the hapless victims he has killed over his career. This is followed by an author’s introduction in which he reflects on the book’s original 2007 publication and details what’s new in this updated edition. The genre has grown over the past decade and introduced new challenges to potential victims and Seth Grahame-Smith is ready to step in and offer further guidance. You can read ZigZag's full review at Horror DNA by clicking here.

  29. 5 out of 5

    Meghan (My World of Books)

    I decided that I wanted to read it because I loved the parts in the “Scream” movie franchise when they would talk about “the rules” for scary movies. (For example: Don’t have sex and Never Ever say “I’ll be right back”)! So, I decided to pick this book up! Now this book is full of all types of useful advice, such as: what to do if you did something last summer, how to tell if you have been dead the whole movie, what to do if you have seven days to live, and even what to do if there ar I decided that I wanted to read it because I loved the parts in the “Scream” movie franchise when they would talk about “the rules” for scary movies. (For example: Don’t have sex and Never Ever say “I’ll be right back”)! So, I decided to pick this book up! Now this book is full of all types of useful advice, such as: what to do if you did something last summer, how to tell if you have been dead the whole movie, what to do if you have seven days to live, and even what to do if there are children in your corn. I loved this book! It was a fun, fast read; funny and very quirky!

  30. 5 out of 5

    Nick Spacek

    the conceit is good: that you know you're in a horror MOVIE, and it plays with the fact that you know it's a movie so fucking well that it's like a love letter to anyone who's a fan of the genre. the in-jokes, the snarky comments, the insightful points ... UGH. i haven't laughed at a book this much in ages, and lord knows it's been a really long time since i randomly read passages aloud, to equal laughter from my wife. i'm buying so many copies of this to give out as presents.

Add a review

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Loading...
We use cookies to give you the best online experience. By using our website you agree to our use of cookies in accordance with our cookie policy.